Actions Speak Louder Than Words
by sonny65
Summary: John Ross and Pamela Rebecca "Get out, Get out and leave me alone!" What has come between these star crossed newly weds? Who is screaming these words? Take a look at this fanfic and this awesome pairing. Go on, you might just enjoy it!
1. Chapter 1

**Shocked and surprised that there no stories for the pairing of John Ross and Pamela Rebecca I decided to have ago myself because I love them so much! Hope I do this awesome couple justice. :)**

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the character from the show Dallas.**

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**Actions Speak Louder Than Words**

**Chapter 1**

"Get out!" "Get out and leave me alone!" She screamed as she threw an antique china vase at his head.

"Pamela what in the hell are you doing?" He swiftly side stepped the vase as it narrowly missed him, instead crashing into the wall behind. He moved quickly and ducked as the vase is rapidly followed by another priceless ornament masquerading as a torpedo. He maneuvered swiftly and edged towards her, hands held up in submission.

"Whoa there darlin you nearly had my head!" The corners of his mouth upturned slightly into a roguish grin. He had to admit she looked stunningly sexy all fired up like that, her eyes ablaze with fury, her hair flaying around her shoulders and curves swaying as she began to stork towards him. He stepped back.

"And that's exactly what I'm gonna do if you don't get out, I'll give you to the count of 5. 1,...2,...

"Now Pamela... darlin hol..." He was cut off, she continued the count.

"3,... 4,... She paused and reached for another larger antique. "5!" John Ross made it to the lift and the doors closed just as the ornament landed. His phone rang, he retrieved it from his pocket and looked at the caller id... He didn't recognise the number he pressed reject and closed the phone.

He needed time to think, what in the hell had her so riled? And then it hit him, like a cold shower in the arctic, that crazy bitch Emma had been to see Pamela. It had to be, that was the only thing that made sense.

Emma had come to him about a month ago, he should have told Pamela then but he didn't want to hurt her, their relationship was still so fragile and he was terrified of the effect the news would have on her emotional state. What a fool he had been, he should have know there was never going to be a good time to tell Pamela something like this... Emma was carrying his child... He had been stunned, but he couldn't deny the possibility.

It was the night of his Fathers funeral, that was the night when he had taken one of Emma's pills, the night he had felt so alone. The night he had needed Pamela the most. He had wanted to reach out to her but all he could think about was the fact that she had never chosen him, about the fact that when he had needed her in the past, he had never been her choice. She had chosen her father, she had sided with Christopher and he had felt betrayed. Her actions had proven her words to be lies and he wanted to hurt her. He realised he was not being rational, hadn't she turned up at the funeral to show him that she cared? Looking back he recognised that he had been so angry and devastated at the loss of his Father, that he had lashed out and he had done that because he had needed her so badly, needed to believe that she was there for him but he could not. So he reverted to type and took the easy option, escaping into oblivion by having meaningless, pointless sex with Emma Instead.

He felt like he had never been first choice for anyone in his life, not for his Mum whom for the longest time had chosen the bottle, not for his father, who had always chosen oil, not for his Uncle Bobby or Elena who had sided with and chosen Christopher, Emma had chosen him and he fooled himself into thinking that she was enough, in that moment it would be OK because she had chosen him! Damn it! Now it was all ruined, Pamela would never forgive him and he was potentially going to be a Father, he didn't know quite how he felt about that and for the time being he didn't much care! He needed to talk to Pamela, if he could just show her, make her understand what she meant to him then maybe they still had a chance.

He reached for his phone and at that precise moment it began to ring... He glanced at the screen one again; as before the number was unfamiliar, he'd bet his last dollar it was that bitch Emma.

"HELLO!" He snapped in his Texan drawl.

"John Ross, it's me, it's Emma can we meet?" His temper flared and his whole body tensed.

"I told you to stay away from Pamela!" He roared in a tight controlled voice.

"Yeah and I told you that I don't do well with being told what to do, besides," she added; he could hear the smirk in her voice and he didn't like it! Her tone grew more steely. "She needed to know!"

" DAMN YOU EMMA! If you've ruined things between Pamela and me, so help me you'll be sorry!" His anger and contempt seeping into every word he spoke.

"Your threats don't scare me John Ross, after living with my father and grandmother, believe me nothing ever could." The anguish in her voice was lost on John Ross his frustrations bursting forth.

"Trust me, you so much as breath on Pamela again and I'll make life with your family look like an Easter vacation at Disneyland. " He gave her directions and told her where to meet him, He couldn't deal with her today, he was a seething volcano of emotions. The meeting was set for tomorrow and he advised her to stay well away from him back at Southfork. She agreed, he hung up.

He needed to get back to Southfork. He always did his best thinking there and maybe he could talk to Uncle Bobby, he'd be sure to give him advice on Pamela "His Pamela." And make no mistake she was "His." He had no intentions of loosing her. He had lived through the break-up of his relationship with Elena and come out the other side stronger. At the time he had told himself that "Love was for Pussies!" He still believed that to be true, what he and Pamela had was better than some fairy tale BULLSHIT with glitter and rainbows, what they had was TRUTH no pretenses like the Bull-crap Elena and Christopher tried to smokescreen the rest of the world with, they could fool everybody but they couldn't fool him, what he had with Pam was HONEST and TRUE, but it didn't make him a Pussy because what he felt for Pamela was REAL and he would fight to keep it. Sure he could play dirty and so could she, they were both master manipulators, but never with each other not anymore, not since their marriage, it was an unspoken LAW and once they had a chance to talk it would be OK, he was sure of it, he would find a way to show her, he would prove it, he wasn't sure how yet but he wasn't gonna loose this time, she had chosen him and he her, nobody or nothing was gonna get in-between them, he would make sure of that!

With a new resolve, he reached inside his his breast pocket for his sun glasses, all at once he felt her, he felt her presence. He didn't know how but he knew she was there. He paused for a moment and looked up, there was no way he could see her from his position but he sensed her, an image of her standing on the balcony looking off into the distance pierced his mind and his heart ached at being the cause of her disappointment, the reason for re-opening the wound in her grief stricken heart and for a brief moment he considered returning to the apartment, he knew it would be futile, he cursed under his breath, opened the door to his car and sped off...

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**Please comment and let me know what you think, this is only my second ever fan-fic and it would be great to hear what you'll think. Take a look at my other story it's called Shattered Dreams, it's a one-shot and my first attempt. Be gentle with me. I love Dallas and John Ross and Pamela Rebecca in particular. I hope to include other character from the show and maybe a few of my own, who knows? I've no idea how many chapters this one will be but come along for the ride! :)**


	2. Never Been About Just You and Me

**Special mention to Tigger97498 & Nicoley117-TheBlueMartini for their enthusiasm and for being the first to stumble across this story, you guy's made me beam with pride! Thanks also to rebecca List, Steffie G, SLYNNR and 00JLO for their love of this story and for taking the time to review. Also a MASSIVE SHOUT OUT! To CreativeLola for her advice and support, I'm not sure I would have continued without it. Big THANK YOU! to anyone else for their reviews and for favouriting and following the story.**

**The last few minutes of the season finale left me numb and feeling totally duped, not sure how they will fix the mess they've created!**

**Any ways, eough from me, I hope you enjoy it!**

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Dallas or any of it's characters, they belong to TNT.**

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**Actions Speak Louder Than Words**

** Chapter 2**

** Never Been About You and Me**

Her emotions overpowered her the minute he stepped into the Penthouse. An overwhelming sense of fury and contempt surged within her, a switch had been tripped, igniting a torrent of emotions she couldn't identify.

She wanted him gone, she could not tolerate him, she did not want to hear his protestations of innocence; his agile mind calculating a response... No she did not want that! She became vaguely aware of an object flying through the air, she could see the evidence as debris lay strewn on the floor across the room. Did she do that..? Yes..! Yes! She remembered now. Her rage increased her voice spoke, but she did not recognise what it said, her thoughts scrambled darting from what she had been told to what now stood before her! **HIM! ** She was outraged at the sight of him. Dear God let him be gone she thought and then she saw it, that look of lust in his eyes accompanied with his trademark grin. That might have worked this morning but all it achieved now was increase fuel to the already burning heat of hatred and disgust she felt. She recognised that look, how dare he gaze at her that way! The memory of all their most intimate moments flashed through her mind, she felt double-crossed she had been part of a game all along, only she had not been holding a full hand! **FOOL! ** she admonished herself, she should have known. She had felt it this morning but she had allowed herself to be convinced otherwise. She began to count... She wanted to harm him, if he had been any closer she would have strangled him with her bare hands. She pounced towards him but he was too quick. A missile trajected in-front of her and slammed against the lift door a millisecond after John Ross had entered. That had wiped the smile off the cocky son of bitches face! she affirmed to herself.

She surveyed the room her mind a mass of un-answered questions, she stood there among the wreckage of her Penthouse and she was lost, her head was reeling, she felt un-balanced. She was there but she was not present she closed her eyes and tried to center herself. It did not help. Her eyes darted around the room had she created all this chaos? She attempted to gather the pieces. They were like broken fragments of her life irreparably damaged... She reached for the last jagged segment; she didn't register the pressure she applied, her focus shifting constantly. It pierced her skin causing a deep gash, she barely felt it, she was aware only of a dull sensation, she glanced down – blood was pouring from her palm, the sight of the dark liquid oozing from her hand jolted her into motion. She moved swiftly and attended to her wound. As she did so, as she repaired the damage to her hand the haze in her mind seemed to clear.

The injury was throbbing not unlike the vibrations in her head, memories came flooding back... John Ross had got Emma Ryland pregnant! The thought not only repelled her it filled her with envy as it evoked images of the emptiness she had endured since the loss of her beloved babies, collateral damage, scarified in her Father's obsessions with the Ewings. In her mind they were all culpable, Ewings, Rylands, Barnes, all connected, all intertwined in their greed for power resulting in the ultimate loss of her children. Emma, she scoffed silently, that scheming little bitch was going to be a MOTHER! The horror of it consumed her, it suffocated and strangled her mind until the only thing left was **HATE... HATE!** for them **BOTH! HATE!** for them **ALL!** Her mind changed direction but she was not in control, it appeared to her as if she was an audience member viewing a showing of the latest episode in a soap. Only it wasn't a soap it was her life and someone else had the remote, selecting scenes she wasn't ready to relive... They had selected **PLAY **there she was it was this morning...

Her day had started well... She moaned deeply; her eyes remained closed as she savoured the warmth of her slumber, she wasn't ready to begin the day. Just one more minute she mused as she smiled silently to herself. She breathed in deeply causing her chest to rise suggestively the scent of him enveloped her senses creating a tingling sensation. She expelled slowly encouraging her breast to fall seductively back to their original position she gently opened her eyes and was greeted by a deliciously gorgeous John Ross propt on one side with his head cradled in one hand. He was transfixed, she glimpsed a hint of passion in his blue and green orbs and she decided to tease.

"I'm not sure my husband would appreciate you gawping at me that way... Darlin?"

"Is that right! Well Darlin – a pause, I'm not sure my wife would appreciate you sleeping in my bed?"

"Touche` Mr Ewing!" she conceded smiling broadly.

"I always love it when you surrender Mrs Ewing." He bandied back grinning happily as he reached towards her and pulled her to rest on top of him.

Pamela was surprised John; as she had taken to calling him whenever she felt particularly tender or concerned about him, never actively sought her to be in a position of dominance. She searched his face for the reason behind this sudden switch in their foreplay. He looked hesitant, something was on his mind she had felt it for a few weeks now but had decided he would share his thoughts when and only when he was ready, it would do no good to push him. He clenched his bottom lip between his teeth; this nervous tick consistently presented itself when he was uncertain. He always seemed so confident and in essence he was but in the two months they had been together there had been moments when the cocksure man had been replaced by the lonely uncertain boy he had once been. Those moments were brief almost fleeting, barely visible to anyone else yet clear and glaring to her razor sharp mind, eager to feast on every morsel of detail where it concerned him.

She knew he had been deeply hurt as a child by the feud between his parents and their neglect of him had cost him dearly, his fragile heart had been held to ransom encased in an ice box waiting for the right person to pay the price. She had made a down payment and she could feel the shift, knew it was melting, she knew because she felt it, it was there in his "Actions" it was there in the way he looked at her, especially when he did not think she was looking... The button on the remote was pressed **REWIND... **it **STOPPED** at exactly 1 month!

They had attended their first business dinner, when she had teased him, he had sworn blind he was not the jealous type but whenever another man came too close he always found himself nearby, particularly if it was one he did not know, his arm would encircle her waist, pulling her closer until the predator had moved on to his next prey.

"I thought you didn't get jealous John Ross!;" barely able to contain the amusement in her tone.

"Hey. Darlin! Just showing a little friendly concern we got an empire to protect!"

"I don't believe you John Ross!" For an instant he looked like a guilty child that had been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. He leaned his head to one side and scrunched his face as if he were in pain.

" I hate to break it to you Darlin but Jordan Lee II is a philandering opportunist looking for anyway to get his hooks into a good deal, heck most of the men here are working from the same angle! An there's no way in hell I'm gonna stand by and let that happen!" Triumphant when he managed to supply a plausible explanation.

"Need I remind you John Ross, I've been a successful business women for some time now, I was one long before we met and us being married hasn't change that. I don't need you circling around protecting your assets, I can take care of myself!" She was about to turn and leave, he anticipated her move and reached for her hand. A hint of an apology in his gaze, their eyes locked, his ardor began to build. He pulled her in, his voice deepened an octave as he responded to her outburst.

" I'm never letting anybody come between us Pamela, this marriage is for keep's I don't plan on getting a divorce, you're the only woman I'm ever gonna marry, believe in us Pamela, believe in what you see. I meant it when I said that we'd fight our battles together, that includes me making sure your OK and you trusting that whatever happens in our life together I'm not gonna hurt you!" His eyes scorched hers with their intensity they pleaded for her to see into his soul and acknowledge the truth she saw there. **STOP, FAST FORWARD. **A myriad of scenes flashed before her at super speed the **PLAY **button was selected to resume at the point at which she had left. Her on top of John Ross; him doing that thing with his lip looking up at her. She felt her body temperature increase as it often did when he looked at her that way. He reached up and swept her hair behind her shoulders, he did it so gently, his gaze never leaving hers, searching... searching... but for what?

"John?" she asked suddenly a little concerned. "What's going on?"

"Why'd you marry me Pamela?" His eyes continuing their investigation.

"I answered that when we got married. What's wrong... Where is this coming from?" A sense of urgency and desperation coated her voice. She rolled away from him and straighten, sitting upright, angling her body towards him. John Ross mirrored her.

"I'm being straight with you Pamela, no bullshit! I wanna know... I'm not interested in the rest of it. I wanna know, I'm asking about just YOU! and ME! Do you love me Pamela? His tone softened as he spoke the last sentence, he continued. "Did you choose me?" He was eerily serious his cheek pulsating as he crunched down on his jaw.

"John Ross, I... I don't understand I married you, I helped you frame my father. I did everything you asked, she was confused.

"I don't give a damn about that, I don't care about our father's I wanna know if You. Chose Me! The last two words coming in quick succession. A cloud descended over his features, the shift in his demeanor startled her.

She wasn't sure she understood, why was he asking her that and why now? Damn it she was becoming irritated, she had already declared her love for him. Once when they got married and again at Southfork, right before he had asked for her help in setting up her father. Men did an awful lot of talk about being strong and containing their emotions but underneath it all they were just as fragile, well she wanted answers, she snapped with impatience.

"What's this about John Ross?" He stood up he did not turn and face her, his bare back forming a shield between them, causing her temper to simmer, waiting to explode at any moment, He spoke.

"Forget it Pamela, it's never been about just you and me... Hell I don't even know why I brought it up? If she was angry before, she was seething now and it showed in her voice, she jumped out of bed swiveling quickly to face him.

"Oh no you don't John Ross! No you don't!" He turned on hearing the venom in her voice. She continued. "EXPLAIN! You don't get to say stuff like that then take it back!" She was ready to battle.

She looked at him standing across from her, she thought she would see a reflection of her anger in him but as he returned her gaze she did not see anger, he looked serious... No more thoughtful than serious, yes that was it thoughtful... but about what? She was even more confused. Why did she feel like she was part of some game she knew nothing about? She felt nervous, vulnerable... Had he been playing her? What was happening? She waited for her answer, if this was a game she was gonna play. The next move was his!

"Pamela, I should never have said those things, I'm an ungrateful son of a bitch, things are going so well for us right now. I guess I keep expecting something to go wrong, things always fall apart for me just right when I feel like I'm on top, I can't quite believe it's gonna be OK, that I've finally won. That we won! He had made his way towards her and was standing in front of her; as he often did reaching for her hand, she pulled away and stepped back.

"Trust me John Ross, I'm no push over, I understand the need to question everything and mistrust everyone, but I've proven how I feel about you, I know you care about me and maybe in time you'll be able to say how much, but I'm OK with that. I don't need hearts and flowers so long as I know what we have is REAL and that I can TRUST you like I hope you TRUST me! The tension in the room was palpable. He spoke first.

"I do!" A tinge of a smile creased his lips. The battle had been won.

"I do!" she repeated echoing his smile... They had both won.

"Let's meet for lunch at your Penthouse, It'll give us a chance to get away from Barnes Global, Ewing Energies and Ewing Oil for a while and we can strategize our next take over." His lips bloomed into a genuine grin, which only added to his charm.

"And there was I thinking you were getting all romantic!" She beamed as she stepped closer and linked her arms around his neck, his hand rested on her hips and her earlier concerns ebbed away replaced by feelings of warmth, contentment and TRUST.

"Who me romantic?" He quipped stepping back and gesturing towards himself. "Now come on Mrs Ewing, your talking about John Ross Ewing III. A man who club's women over the head in order to drags them to his man cave , does that sound romantic to you?" Her arms had released their tender hold of him, her hand returned to her side. He moved closer his hands retracing their steps to her hips. She replied.

" Now Darlin;" she use his trademark word. "I don't think I'm ever likely to forget your John Ross Ewing III, you just better REMEMBER who I am! She chastised as she used her index finger to bring her next point home; a separate jab for each word she spoke. I. Am. Mrs. Pamela. Rebecca. Ewing. III. And there better not be any dragging of females to any man cave. She leaned closer and kissed him deeply nipping his bottom lip as she finished.

"Hey! He whelped. " Mrs Pamela Rebecca Ewing III , that hu..."

"Last one to the shower is a Pussy! "He didn't have a chance to finish his sentence, he tried to hold on to her but she was gone, the chase was on! The** STOP **button had been pressed there were no further images she was on the bathroom floor back at her Penthouse. What she wouldn't give to return in that moment but she had to face facts. Emma was pregnant, she had heard it from the horses mouth.

She wandered out onto the balcony it always helped her think, she needed to pull herself together she had a meeting back at Ewing Energies sometime this afternoon she needed to focus. He was probably somewhere below now pulling off in his car, probably on his way to meet his little Whore!She had been alone before she could do it again, she didn't need him she didn't need any man she would make them PAY! And nothing was going to stop HER!... **TBC**

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**Thank you for reading this chapter. Hope you enjoyed it. The next chapter continues with Pamela at Ewing Global. Another pivotal character in the Dallas series is also there, see what happens when they collide. Hope you'll enjoy it! :) **


	3. Loyalty

**Thank you to all who reviewed the last chapter! And many thanks to those who have favourited and are following the story. :)**

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters from Dallas or the show itself. They ALL belong to TNT.**

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**Actions Speak Louder Than Words**

**Chapter 3**

**Loyalty**

"I think that takes care of that!" She finished still reeling from the revelations of earlier in the day. She had used her new found resolve to dominate the turn of events at this meeting causing a few raised eyebrows as she went toe to toe and drove her arguments home. She piled her papers together and place them in her leather briefcase, ensuring that she did not aggravate her wound.

"My, your father would be proud of the way you handled yourself here today sugar, reckon it was a smart move to get into Methane!"

"Thank you Colton, that means a lot coming from you!" She replied a hint of playfulness in her voice, that she did not feel. "My father always spoke really highly of you. I'm glad your part of the new Ewing Global."

"Well now, I wasn't sure that'd make a whole heep of difference to you sugar, considering what's been going on around here lately? " he chuckled with a slither of mischievousness to his query. "I was as shocked as a bolt a lightenin strikin in the same place twice when I heard you'd changed the name of the company, I mean Ewing Global...? Hell... You sure pissed at your Daddy... What'd he do besides killin JR and getting caught to make you **this** mad sugar?" "Say didn't you marry JR's boy? Whatever it is you sure as hell stickin it to him where it'd hurt him the most aah sugar? It's got damn near everybody in Dallas talking that's for sure!" He boomed with a devilish glint in his eye.

"**H**is the **M**urdering **S**on of a **B**itch that **K**illed our **B**abies **THAT** reason enough for you!" Roared Christopher... Deathly silence. Not everybody had left the boardroom, horror and embarrassment was etched on their faces. Pamela gasped silently as she relived the moment she had been privy to her fathers treachery, she had to pull on every reserve she had to prevent herself from expelling the contents of her stomach.

"**Christopher!**" She managed. Giving him a look that only two people who shared a loss as deep as their's, would understand. "Can you excuse us!" she turned to the board members who were by now shuffling papers and squirming in their seats. They silently did as she bid and then she turned. " Colton, as always a pleasure, look forward to seeing you at the fundraiser next week." She extended her hand, he accepted and left without a word.

"What in the HELL was THAT ?!" She charged.

"THAT PAMELA! Was me letting THEM know what a sick, twisted, evil, MURDERING, piece of crap Cliff Barnes is!" He motioned his head to the remaining board members. "THAT PAMELA! Was me letting THEM know that I may not be able to prove it but that he did it... He did it! He had started his tirade across the room but now stood before her. "You really are a COLD BITCH! Ever the business woman huh Pamela! Covering up Daddies mistakes! Heaven forbid anybody should find out! I don't get you Pamela, he continued, why do you persist in shielding him?" The door shut silently... They were alone!

"Don't...! Don't you dare...! I felt sick just then it took everything in me to stop myself from wretching but you wouldn't know that would you Christopher 'cos you're so hell bent on painting me as a **C**old **C**alculating **B**itch!" She spat in disgust "After everything I've done, everything I've been doing, there wouldn't be a Ewing Global if it wasn't for me helping to frame my father, without me he wouldn't be behind bars! For a moment he was stunned.

"I KNOW that Pamela but you're acting as if you don't want anybody to know, as if it's some dirty little secret... They were innocent Pamela our loyalty should be to them not to hi..."

"Loyalty?" She interrupted. "You talk of loyalty to me?" Her features angeled and twisted with loathing. "You act like you're the only one hurting, standing there with your pious attitude, where were you putting them first when you ran to Elena, you cou..."

"Don't you bring Elena into this!" It was his turn to interrupt. "When **I **ran to Elena? Hmm. Well... what'd you expect me to do when **YOU **lied to me. **AGAIN. **After **I** gave **YOU** a chance to come clean?" He was screaming in her face now, barely containing his saliva as he ranted.

"How can I **not** bring Elena into this? If you had really loved me or our children, it never would have been so easy to rush back to her?"

"You lied Pamela, you can't excuse that, you knew I loved her, you knew and you plotted and schemed to break us up!" His disdain for her was apparent in his stance, his glare and the force with which he spoke.

"I know. I've said I'm sorry, but I'm not the only one who lied all those times we were together... "

"What do you mean by that?" He demanded.

"You know what, It doesn't even matter anymore! I'm not doing this... It's been done, I'm not gonna spend my life apologising to you. You ask me what I expected? I expected you to put them first." she said simply her eyes filled with tears.

"I expected you to consider the strain you were putting me under when you tried to prosecute me for murder! You never even considered whether my motives might me justified, no just that I'm a COLD BITCH! And in case you forgot Christopher you paraded her in-front of me every chance you got! So yes, I get to bring your precious Elena into it anytime I choose, she supported all your decisions, she's as much a part of this as you or I.

"While you were attacking me, did you take a second to wonder if my life and the lives of our babies were in danger, did she? I couldn't believe how eagerly you pursued me, all the while dutifully supported by **her** bouncing from boardroom to courtroom like a brunette Barbie and Ken!"

"Tell me Chris were you putting them first when you decided I should go to prison? How lovely that would have been for them! Were you putting them first when you screamed at me about taking them away from me? Or were you driven by your obsession with making me pay?"

"How many scan appointments did you attend? How many times did you stop to ask if everything was OK? Who's feelings were you putting first when you made those decisions, where was your loyalty to our babies then!" He bowed his head and rubbed his hand across his neck, sighing deeply.

"Please don't talk to me about loyalty to our babies Christopher, because whatever else I am, I was loyal to them, they grew inside of **ME. ** You can choose to believe me or not, but I was loyal to you too, it didn't start that way I know but I did love you and I tried to put it right. She looked passed him and made her way to the huge windows across the room. He turned and came to stand beside her his hand in his pockets, silent as his mind registered her words.

"You see Christopher I think that's my greatest flaw, I don't trust or love easily but when I do I'm loyal. I've been like that with very few people in my life but every time I've been burned. I'm done doing that anymore. I'll stick to what I do best, I don't need anybody I'll be fine by myself." She took a deep breath, "I'll make them pay Christopher all of them, my father included but not like this! Not by exposing the shame of their grandfather's part in their reason for not being."

"I'll tell you something Christopher you asked me why I'm shielding my father and my answer is this... I am not shielding my father. I am shielding them; our babies. They deserve better, they deserve to be mourned but not as the babies who were murdered by their sadistic Grandfather, who couldn't see past their Ewing name. I don't want that for them and if you could see past your hatred for my father and your contempt for me **Y**ou wouldn't want that for them either."

He looked at her and it was a revelation, he could see torture embedded in her features, but there was a dignity he had not noticed before, it was evident in her carriage and the determined set of her jaw, it irked him to admit it but the words she had spoken had touched a nerve... **S**he **W**as **R**ight. He had been consumed with animosity towards her and in doing so had failed to be the best he could have been for his children.

He was not ready to compute Elena's role in the whole sorry mess but her reasons for not wanting to implicate her father in their childrens' murder had resonated also, once again making him feel strangely uncomfortable, for too long he had viewed himself as her enemy, these emotions were alien to him.

She had been the mother of his murdered children, that would never change and in this briefest of moments he had encountered a side of her and himself he had never acknowledged before, in that rarest of glimpses he had felt he understood her better than he ever had, indeed it gave a renewed clarity to his own actions and a sudden surge of empathy and remorse engulfed him, he did something he had not done with regard to her, since they had parted ways. He reached across to her, he couldn't explain why but in that moment he felt that it was the right thing to do. She withdraw her hand immediately and he felt like a **F**ool! **DUPED. ** **A**gain!

The withdrawal of her hand was quickly followed by a yelp. He snapped his head round quickly looking down towards her hand to investigate the reason for her pain. It was then he noticed the bandage around it, why had he not noticed that before..? He felt a little ashamed, it was such a visibly glaring injury and yet it had been invisible to him right up until this very moment. He felt as if he was seeing her with fresh eyes, this was Pamela Rebecca Ewing III, not Rebecca Sutter that person never really existed; or maybe parts of her did, he wasn't sure. His mind was a whirlpool of thoughts and feelings he was not able to process.

"What happened?" He was careful to remove any trace of concern from his tone.

"I had an accident with an antique china vase." She explained; she wasn't sure if she was ready to share what had happened between her and John Ross.

"You didn't have that on your hand this morning at Southfork... did you?" He was unsure, he tried to recall but he couldn't."

"No... No I did it back at the Penthouse, earlier." He looked intrigued as he waited for her to expand, he smiled tightly, his eyes forming into accusatory slits when she didn't.

"You and John Ross get a little too eager I'm guessing?"

"No!" She said a little too forcefully and immediately regretted her lack of control.

"Whoa, the Barnes-Ewing merger in trouble already, thought you would have lasted a bit longer **t**his **t**ime Pamela?" There was a hint of contemptuous satisfaction in his voice. He didn't know why he'd said that, but as soon as the words were spoken he realised he drew a twisted sense of gratification from the look of anguish on her face. He was conflicted were it concerned her, he could not un-tangle his emotions, theirs was a complicated relationship and he was not sure it would ever un-ravel in a way that made sense.

"John Ross is going to be a father!" She blurted. Each word leaving a bitter taste in her mouth."

He was stunned. Her words plunged like a knife to his gut, he felt as though he had been mortally wounded. His mouth agape, he was barely able to gather a coherent response. Just as he was ready to reply she continued.

"You don't understand," she turned and moved towards the desk trying to place some distance between them; the last thing she wanted was his pity!

"Not with me! I'm not pregnant!"

"I'm sorry I don't follow?" He puzzled.

"It's Emma Ryland, she's having his baby."

"WHAT? How did that happen?" He questioned; In his mind equilibrium had been restored and he felt weirdly comforted that she had not been pregnant...?

"You know if it wasn't all so pathetic, I'd find that funny!"

She retrieved her leather briefcase and headed towards the door. Her phone rang. It was John Ross. Judging by her phone log he had called her twice in the last half hour. She decided to take the call, she never backed down from a fight and she wasn't about to begin now."

"What do you want John Ross?" she asked her voice betraying nothing.

"I want to talk Pamela, I need a chance to explain." His tone was firm, yet not cold it held a note of tenderness.

"OK, I'll be at Southfork this evening, shall we say about 8, I've a few loose ends to tie up here so I'll see you then. She hung up and exhaled a breath she wasn't aware she had been holding as she reached out to open the door.

"That was John Ross I take it?" Her mind was racing, she had forgotten that Christopher was even there, she swiveled her head to look behind her, as she caught his gaze she closed her eyes with resignation and nodded her head in reply, she felt drained.

"Listen Pamela, I've gotta go, I'll see you back at Southfork I guess?"

"Yep, I guess..." He moved swiftly across the room and exited the now open door without a second glance. Pamela watched as he strolled across the foyer towards the lifts. He made a dashing figure, he was still quite the most beautiful man she had ever seen and she would always regret what she had done to him and the repercussions her actions had caused, she would never, however, regret carrying their twins.

Her deepest wish was for them to repair their friendship, it saddened her enormously that they were so awkward and spiteful with each other, she wanted to put their relationship right for the sake and in memory of their children; Ellie and Robert. She shook her head, took a deep breath and headed out, that would have to wait. She needed to focus she had one most important stop to make before she met with John Ross and she didn't want to be late. She closed the door behind her, gaining more and more in confidence and vigor with each step. She was looking forward to her meeting with John Ross this evening. Game On!...

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**Well that's the 3rd Chapter finished I hope you're still enjoying the ride. I wonder who Pamela's appointment is with? I'll give you a chance to think about, she wont be back till Chapter 5 so have a guess. Sorry to anyone who's feeling a little John Ross deprived he's back in the next chapter, we get a glimpse of his conversation with "Uncle Bobby" and a few other surprise twist too! See you all soon :)**


	4. The Most Natural Thing in The World

Actions Speak Louder Than Words Chapter 4

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters from Dallas or the show itself. They ALL belong to TNT.**

**Thanks again for all the lovely reviews... Sorry for the slight delay in updating. daydreamer987 sorry Pamela is not off to confirm a pregnancy and to my Guest reviewer she's not visiting Sue Ellen either! All will be revealed in the next chapter!**

**Great news about the renewal of Dallas for Season 3, hopefully they can put right the mess they made of John Ross at the end of Season 2... I'm still mad about that! (That NEVER happened in this fic!) Any how here goes... ENJOY!**

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**Actions Speak Louder Than Words**

**Chapter 4**

**The Most Natural Thing in the World**

He could hear raised voices before he even got inside the house at Southfork. It didn't sound good, he knew who was behind the commotion, he could hear uncle Bobby pleading for calm and Emma's hysterical screaming... Damn it she was Trouble with a capital **T**! As he entered three pairs of eyes burned into his. He shut the door behind him ready for the on-slaught.

"How could you John Ross, how could you take advantage of her like that?" Ann accused moving passed Bobby and Emma as she spoke.

"Hold on what in the hell are you talking about?" Demanded John Ross as he side stepped Ann and stood in-front of Emma. "What in the HELL did you say to them!" As he spoke he placed his hands either side of Emma and shook her, as if trying to bring her to her senses.

"Don't you touch her you animal get your hands off her!" Screamed Ann as she rushed towards John Ross and pushed him away.

"Now, let's calm down here!" Reasoned Bobby. "We're not helping anybody by launching at each other, why don't you take Emma upstairs, while I speak to John Ross in the study." Anns eyes were wild, she looked as if she were about to argue but after exchanging glances with Bobby she yielded and guided Emma upstairs. As Emma was lead away she turned and said.

"I told you I don't do well being told what to do! You thought you could keep what you did to me a dirty little secret but I guess you were wrong! Good luck trying to worm outta this one John Ross!" His temper flared and Bobby was just in time to prevent John Ross from going after her. He placed his hands on him and applied firm pressure, enough to re-focuss John Ross.

"You aint gonna get away with this Emma! So help me you made your biggest mistake messing with me and Pamela!" Bobby realeased his hold of him and entered the study, whilst John Ross remained fixed to the spot at the bottom of the stairs looking up as if in a trance.

"John Ross, let's talk." John Ross heared his uncle Bobby but could not move, he needed a moment to assess what had transpired. What in the heck had just happened? What had that crazy bitch told them? JR had been right when he tried to warn him about taking up with crazy women only he should have applied that advice in relation to Emma not Pamela. He heared his uncle's voice again this time louder and with more intent.

"John Ross!"

He took one last look up the stairs and made a mental note to find some way to "Get that bitch back!" He entered the study as his uncle poured two glasses of Borbon placing one infront of him.

"Is it true, is she pregnant?" Bobby's face took on a pained expression as he waited for his nephew to respond. John Ross hung his head.

"I'm not proud of it uncle Bobby, heck I don't even know if I'm the father but there's a possibility. I swear I've never been with her since me and Pamela got married!" He looked across the desk at his uncle waiting for any sign that his uncle believed what he had just said. It was important to him.

"She say's you forced yourself on her and that you've been harassing her ever since she came back from re-hab a couple weeks ago. She say's you wanted a real relationship with her but that you were waiting for the right time to leave Pamela."

"She's lying uncle Bobby! That doesn't even make any sense?" He took a sip of the fiery liquid and continued as Bobby scrutinized his every word and gesture "I slept with her; yeah sure I'll admit that but I never forced her, I've never forced a woman in my life and I never would. JR may have been many things when it came to women but he always said. "Son, if you gotta force yourself on a woman, you aint no man and you certainly aint no Ewing!"

"I was there uncle Bobby I remember what JR's cheating did to my mama, I'd never do that to Pamela, not after everything we've been through, not after everything she did for me, for our family... I **Love** her uncle Bobby!..." It felt right, it felt like the most natural thing in the world, he couldn't believe how the words had rolled right off his tongue like, it felt good to finally admit it out loud, the thoughts had been running around in his head for months now and it was a relief to finally share them with someone, he was pleased it had been with his uncle Bobby all he needed to do now was to tell Pamela.

The two men, uncle and nephew looked at each other both hoping to find honesty in the other. Looking for the opportunity to connect on a deeper level than they had so far. It had started when Bobby had welcomed John Ross to Southfork and again when they had discussed their Pamela's, continuing when Bobby had asked John Ross about securing Pamela's shares and progressing to this very moment. They were at a crossroad.

Bobby stood up and came to stand next to John Ross, he knew that his nephew had strong feelings for Pamela, if not then why did he marry her? From what John Ross had explained it had not been necessary. He had to admit that what Emma had said didn't make a great deal of sense and he couldn't help but feel un-easy about her persecution of his nephew, he had always found her to be a little off, slightly skewed and his opinion had not changed. Placing his hand firmly on his nephew's shoulder, John Ross turned hesitantly and looked up at his uncle, clenching his lower lip as he did so.

"I believe you... I believe you John Ross!" A hint of a smile passed across Bobby's lips. John Ross heaved a sigh of relief, his uncle Bobby had chosen him, for the first time ever and it felt good. "Why'd ya think she's lying?" questioned Bobby.

"I'd put money on it that she's not really sure who the father of her baby is and I think since she can't find Drew she's looking to cause trouble for me and Pamela instead. She's twisted uncle Bobby, I don't know what it is but she's really got it in for Pamela!"

"I think you're the reason for that, I've seen how she is around you, always trying to get your attention, I put it down to a harmless crush I never dreamed you'd act on it by sleeping with her. Damn it John Ross when are you gonna learn you can't solve everything with sex! Not every woman who offers or is available is a safe option, I thought you'd have learned that after Marta! Does Pamela know?" John Ross hung his head in shame. His uncle was right!

"Yeah I'm not sure how but I'm guessing Emma called Pamela or went to see her or something 'cos when I went to meet Pamela for lunch at the Penthouse today she just screamed at me to get out and threw things at me, it all makes a little more sense now, I mean I knew Pamela would be upset but her re-action was so severe I couldn't quite make sense of it. I need to talk to her uncle Bobby I gotta explain."

"I know you do son but you gotta give her some time, call her in a little while." "Here." He said as he filled both their glasses some more. "I'll sit here with you while we figure a way outta this mess!" John Ross was surprised, he always had to figure things out for himself, he was never offered advice he didn't seek. Never took it either.

"I'm not looking to cause trouble between you and Ann, I never meant for that to happen. I came here after my fight with Pamela hoping you and I could talk and maybe you'd be able to help me figure out a way to get her to hear me out... To hear my side."

" And we'll do that but right now trust me, you don't wanna be anywhere near her, if there's one thing I've learned it's that when a Barnes women get's riled, you better watch out; I think you've already found that out." His own memories causing him to chuckle briefly "No what you need to do right now is to give her a couple hours to calm down a day or two maybe bett..."

"No uncle Bobby that wont work for me, I'm not letting the day end without speaking to her, I'm willing to give her a couple hours but if I've not spoken with her by then I'm going after her uncle Bobby and I'm gonna find her; wherever she is and make her listen to me! I'm gonna make things OK again!" He took a final swig of the contents of his tumbler and place it down hard on the desk.

"I'm gonna go talk to Emma, she needs to tell the truth, she can't get away with this!" He was so certain in his mind that he stood to make his way upstairs, but was somewhat surprised at his uncle's command.

"Sit down John Ross! Leave Emma to me!"

"What do you plan on doing uncle Bobby?"

"Well first thing I'm gonna do is arrange for a paternity test so we can establish whether you are the father or not, I know just who to call we'll use the same people we used for Christopher and Pame..." He stopped feeling somewhat awkward about finishing the sentence.

"Pamela!" John Ross finished for him. "It's OK uncle Bobby it's not like it's a secret, Christopher and Pamela were married and Pamela carried his babies until recently, but that was in the past, it doesn't make me uncomfortable to mention it, they have no feelings for each other they barely talk!" Bobby looked as if he wanted to say something and was about to when the door to the study was opened. It was Ann.

"She's sleeping, I thought I'd come down and see what lies John Ross has been spouting about my daughter!" Her eyes were cold, one arm held behind her back as she spoke.

"Your daughter's the liar here Ann but I guess you'd know that if you'd raised her yourself?" Argued John Ross, his agitation with the situation intensifying.

"Let see how you lie once your staring down these barrels A shot rang out and flew just past Bobby's shoulder as he manged to push John Ross out of the way. Ann raised her shot gun and aimed again.

"Are you crazy Ann!" Bobby exclaimed as he rushed towards her and snatched the shot gun making sure to disarm it swiftly. "After everything we went through, you decided to arm yourself again!"

"Damn... You just as crazy as your psycho delusional daughter" manged John Ross as he pulled himself up off the floor.

"Thanks uncle Bobby you know you might get a discount if you commit them both at the same time!" A devilish grin danced across his lips as he raised one perfectly arched eyebrow to punctuate his point. his uncle looked over at him with an exasperated look on his face.

"You gonna let that philandering man whore talk to me like that, you know what he's done!" Bobby looked from John Ross to Ann and back to John Ross, whose eyes pleaded for him to speak on his behalf, Bobby knew he could not let him down, but he also knew that siding with John Ross would cause damage to his relationship with Ann. He breath in deeply, he knew what he had to do.

"Ann of course John Ross shouldn't talk to you like that but your hardly making a solid case for yourself considering your still on probation you did just try to kill him!" He secured the gun and went to embrace her. "Honey I know what Emma's just shared with us came as a huge shock, but if your gonna react like this every time something unexpected happens then we're in serious trouble."

"Stop pussy footing around uncle Bobby, tell her Emma's lying!" Ever impatient John Ross wanted at the truth as soon as possible, he was done wasting anymore time, the longer Pamela had to think things through the slimmer his chances of winning her back. He wasn't prepared to take the chance of loosing her based on his uncle's attempts at trying to placate his wife.

Bobby wanted to strangle John Ross blurting things out wasn't gonna help anyone. He always was a hot head, why would he be any different now especially given how much was riding on the truth.

"You don't believe **him **do you Bobby?" She looked stunned, shocked and Bobby knew that this was going to be easily the most difficult thing that he would have to say to Ann, than he had ever had to say before, they had always stood together no matter what.

"He doesn't deny that the baby could be his but he say's he didn't force himself on her and I believe him." Bobby turned to John Ross and gave him a look of regret as he said.

"Could we be alone for a while?". John Ross nodded his head in agreement as he made his way towards the door.

"Stay away from Emma!" She hissed as he passed.

"Maybe you could get her to stay away from me, how about that?" He replied his glare equally as cold as the one he received.

"That's ENOUGH John Ross, now wait for me on the patio I'll be out in a minute."

John Ross headed for the patio, he had already tried to call Pamela just before he'd arrived, that was a little under half an hour ago he needed to speak to her, he decided to try again. Still no reply damn it he would call back in ten minutes and if he did not get her then he would make his way to the Penthouse and wait for her there.

For a while he was lost in his thoughts he checked his watch and began to dial her number. This time she picked up. She sounded guarded he expected that... At least she had responded to his call, he begun to think he would never get through, it was difficult to describe how not being able to speak to her made him feel he felt comforted at the sound of her voice any connection to her right now was preferable to none at all. A trace of tenderness entered his tone.

"I want to talk Pamela, I need a chance to explain." She responded quickly, she explained that she had some loose ends to tie up at Ewing Global, he couldn't think about that, she had agreed and that was enough for him, he would get a chance to explain and then they would be fixed. He'd deal with that Psycho Barbie later.

After what seemed like hours, but in fact was probably closer to 30 minutes, Bobby emerged from his study with a drink for both he and John Ross, they sat and discussed the fact that Pamela had agreed to come to Southfork, however, it was not lost on John Ross that Bobby had skirted around his parley with Ann.

"You gonna tell me what happened in there!" Teased John Ross, leaning his head to one side as he awaited his uncle's response.

"It's gonna take time John Ross, Emma's her daughter she wants to be there for her!"

"I get that uncle Bobby but at my expense?"

"Their relationship is complicated, Ann just feels like she needs to believe her."

"What! Even if she's lying? Come on uncle Bobby surely she can see that aint what Emma needs, she needs a shrink and maybe a good spankin from her mama with her riding stick, poor little rich girls been spoilt for too long if you ask me?"

"Well I didn't John Ross and violence never solved anything!" replied Bobby distastefully. "I hope you're not suggestin layin your hands on a woman is your solution to a problem!" he added in disgust.

"Now I may be many things, but a woman beater I aint, any man that hits a woman for whatever reason aint no man in my eyes. No I was suggestin that maybe her mama would wanna remind her with a gentle tap like only a parent can that it aint right to lie!"

He had that trademark gleam in his eye an Bobby could not help but smile. Just as they we're sharing that moment with a clink of their glasses, Christopher advanced towards them, he had been standing at the patio doors and had witnessed there cosy little rapour, he didn't like what he saw and he couldn't stomach John Ross worming his way into his fathers affections with his lies!

"Did you forget that when you argued with Pamela earlier?" Demanded Christopher, his eyes flaring with anger and jealousy. John Ross turned swiftly as he heard his cousins voice his face visibly confused.

"What are you talking about Christopher, clearly you've lost your mind?!" He did not stand up from his seat, he did not consider Christopher's accusations seriously, his posture remained relaxed and unaffected, he fiddled with a spare coaster that up until a moment ago had rested next to his hand.

"Don't deny it, I've seen her hand, she winced when I touched her, she was clearly in a lot of pain."

"Why in the hell would you be touching Pamela? If you ask me her reaction probably had more to do with that fact, than any supposed injury. Her hand was fine when I left her at lunch!" John Ross had become slightly irritated at the fact that Christopher was trying to get in his face over Pamela and insinuate that he had physically hurt her in some way! He began to twist the coaster in his hand more rigorously but he remained seated he wouldn't be baited by this Pussy!

"Listen C-o-u-s-i-n." Continued Christopher; emphasizing the last word for effect. "I don't need to explain anything to you, not after what you've done to her! We may no longer be married but we share a bond you'll never understand and I'll be damned if I'll let you screw with her after everything she's been through!"

That was crossing a line. John Ross released the coaster and stood up in an instant.

"Don't you ever try and come between me and Pamela, you don't know anything about us. You can fool yourself about your fictional bond with her because of the loss of your children, but you were never there for her! Yes you both lost your children but it was Me who was there for her! Me who picked up the pieces not You, so don't try and claim a bond with Pamela that I know doesn't exist!"

"Easy boy's this isn't gonna help anything!" said Bobby as he tried to put himself between both men. Christopher stepped back slightly never taking his eyes from John Ross as he resumed his tirade.

"You've always wanted everything I had, right from when we were kid's, you were always jealous of me, that's why you never let me forget that I was adopted and you were the "Real Ewing!" I wasn't surprised when you ended up with Elena after our little mis-understanding, I mean I used to see the look on your face every time Elena and I were together, hell you were so transparent... Elena and I used to let you tag along 'cos frankly... We felt sorry for you but to involve Pamela in your sick obsession with anything that belonged to me, after all shes's been through is prit -ty low!"

John Ross quickly passed Bobby and threw his right fist straight at Christopher's jaw. Christopher responded by throwing a left but John Ross anticipated it and managed to side step, they somehow both ended up on the floor as Bobby tried to detangle them.

"Stop it both of you!" Roared Bobby. "I will not have you two fightin like this!"

"How in hell does he get off saying stuff about me like that and commenting on my relationship with Pamela. How I feel about her aint got a damn thing to do with him, hell I'll put him on the ground again if he breaths another word! Pamela's none of his business. Whatever happened between them is in the past, it was never real. She's married to ME and he's gonna have to find a way to deal with that 'cos it aint never gonna change!"

Bobby kept himself between both men but was physically positioned closer to John Ross.

"Christopher, I don't know what's got into you but I think you owe John Ross an apology!" Christopher was aghast, he could not believe his ears, his father never sided with John Ross, never! What had changed? He looked from one to the other and he could not figure it out, he raised his hand to his jaw; which by now was hurting like hell. He looked directly at John Ross as he spelt out his intentions.

"You might be able to fool my father but you don't fool me, I've been a jerk in the past where Pamela's concerned but what you've done to her with Emma is pretty cheap!" John Ross lunged for him but this time Bobby stopped him. "She's been hurt enough and I'm not gonna let you hurt her again, I owe her that much, I owe our our children that much! She needs somebody in her life she can trust, someone she can rely on and I aim to be that person. I wasn't there for her like I should have been when she was carrying our children but I'm here now, she's proven her loyalty to this family, she deserves our support and respect, especially when she saddled with a scheming, cheating, scoundrel, like You!" He made to cross in-front of his father and John Ross, feeling exalted by his new found perspective as he made his way to re-enter the house. Before he could do so John Ross spoke, venom oozing from his voice, no longer consumed with the need to hurt him physically, he chose to derail him with words.

"You always did think you were better than me! I guess it really hurts to realise that for once someone you had feelings for truly loves me more than they do you! How's it feel now the shoes on the other foot!"

"John Ross!" Bobby warned.

"No uncle Bobby he had his say now let me have mine." His eyes glinted like steel, his face set in stone as he turned to address Christopher.

"You don't presume to tell me what my wife needs or what she sacrificed for this family, I already know and guess what? She did that for me, she did that because I asked her to! She was loyal to me first. This family second, so don't get it twisted! You're feeling guilty and you're looking for absolution, well go find it somewhere else cos it aint welcome here, not by me and definitely not by Pamela, hell! she quit waiting for you to man up after you left her for Elena!"

"She don't need no knight in shinning armor, so if that's what you were thinking, you really don't know Pamela at all! She' strong and feisty and I aint looking to change that; or anything else about her, just like she aint looking to change me. We fit perfectly and I'll be right by her side while we fight our battles together, including this one! Yeah she's hurting right now but once I've straightened out the lies that Ryland bitch told her we'll be OK and she won't need to trust and rely on anybody but me..., so you and your scheming little step sister can take your jealously and stay the hell outta of my marriage! You run along inside and sort out your wreck of a relationship with Elena, because mine... Don't need your help!" He ended his monologue with an unwavering stare and seated himself, as he raised his glass to his lips.

John Ross watched as Christopher seemed to be the boy of their youth with his pouty demeanor as he furiously retraced his steps and went inside. He was aware that his uncle had followed behind, but he was content that in this instance where they were concerned Bobby had finally stepped up to Christopher and it made him feel good. He felt satisfaction at having put Christopher straight regarding his unwanted attempt at meddling in his relationship with his wife. He would deal with Emma tomorrow. Right now he needed to focus on his meeting with Pamela.

He took another sip of his drink, with all the commotion he had not heard the car pull up, his mother had arrived but for a second his heart had lept, he thought it might be Pamela. He didn't want to have to listen to his mothers perspective on his relationship but she was here now and he guessed that was exactly what he was gonna get. Oh well he thought maybe advice from his mama would help him get Pamela back.

" Hey Mama! What bring you to Southfork?"

"I'm here to help you hold on to my new daughter." She reached over to him and caressed his face. "Your father and I loved each other but we almost destroyed each other with our brand of love. I want you to have a chance at a different brand of love, I want you to be happy and with Pamela, I know that it's possible. You love Pamela. I know that, I knew it after I found out the reason you came to me for Cliff's private number. I'm here for you John Ross, I might not have been in the past but I'm here now, so... let's figure out how we're gonna get your Pamela and my new daughter back!..."

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**Wow! That was a long one but I had to get it out 'cos that how I envisaged it! Oh Blimey! Sue Ellen's at Southfork I wonder who grassed up John Ross? Next Chapter will reveal where Pamela has gone and we'll finally get to see her come face to face with John Ross... Thank you for reading until next time. :)**


	5. Scheme, Seduce, Betray

Actions Speak Louder Than Words Chapter 5

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters from Dallas or the show itself. They ALL belong to TNT.**

**Thanks again for all the lovely reviews... Sorry for the delay in updating. Hope you ENJOY it!**

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**Actions Speak Louder Than Words**

**Chapter 5**

**Scheme, Seduce, Betray**

"I told you to treat her right John Ross, what happened?" Sue Ellen decided on the direct approach.

"How'd you find out?" countered John Ross, frustrated that she already seemed to be accusing him.

" I called to speak to Ann and..." John Ross interrupted.

"And she couldn't wait to tell you what a low life son of bitch I was... I'm guessing you've already made up your mind, after all, I'm my father's son "From Tip To Tail!" aint that right mama?" His voice dripping with resentment.

"I think you're forgetting John Ross, you're also half me but even if that weren't the case JR would never do what Emma is accusing you of, so... why don't you tell me what happened?"

Sue Ellen knew this was going to be difficult, she had no intention of rising to the bait. John Ross always found it difficult to accept her total support of him, her failure to bond with him in the first few months of his life and the constant battles between her and JR over custody had affected him and left an uncertainty and resentment that at times was difficult for him to contain. She pulled up a seat and reached over to stroked his arm. He looked up and slowly removed it as he pushed his chair back and stood, his back towards her.

"I never did what she's sayin, but the worst of it is she's claimin I was plannin on leavin Pamela for her. Can you believe that crazy BITCH! I finally find someone who get's me, someone I care about, someone I trust and who cares and trust me too and she comes along and ruins it with her lies! "Huh," a bitter smirk traced his lips, "You know, Pamela once asked me if I believed in karma, I told her no but I'm not so sure anymore, what if it's caught up with me? What if, no matter what I do, Pamela and me are destined to be apart..." The weight of his words washed over him, the magnitude of what he had said registered on his face as he turned and looked at his mother to continue. "What if we're destined to be enemies? What if we're doomed?"

Sue Ellen rose from her seat and made her way towards her son, she had never seen him quite like this, the devastated look on his face broke her heart, she reached and place a hand on his face.

"Now you listen to me John Ross, I don't believe that for a minute and neither should you. You've been the happiest I've ever seen you and that's thanks to Pamela, you two understand each other and you can be yourself when you're with her, you were never like that with Elena. You talk of destinies, what greater destiny than a Barnes and a Ewing, finally coming together to unite our two families." He looked at her, desperate to believe it could be true.

"I knew what Ann told me wasn't true and so will Pamela, she's smart she just needs time, once she's got over the shock she'll come round, she'll realise that you couldn't do a thing like that. You love her, that's gotta count for something!" John Ross removed her hand from his face and placed his either side of her arms.

"She doesn't know that mama, I've never told her!" John Ross blushed and looked sheepishly at Sue Ellen. He studied her intently as she proceeded to give him the benefit of her experience.

"Well then, I think you'd better put that right straight away! JR was just the same, he never could say the word's either but a girl needs to hear them John Ross even a girl as strong and independent as Pamela." She gave him her broadest smile and moved to re seat herself.

"You think it'll make a difference after she get's over the fact that Emma might be carrying my child mama?" Sue Ellen gasped, Ann had not mentioned that, but why?

"She never told you did she? Too busy painting me the monster, I'm not waiting any longer, I'm gonna go wake that little bitch Emma up... Right now!" As he reached the patio doors he heard a car pull up, it was her, it was Pamela, he turned swiftly his eyes locked with his mothers. Sue Ellen watched as her son took a huge sigh and ajusted his posture as if steeling himself for battle...

"Now John Ross this must have come as a huge shock to her, you've gotta hear her out, you've got to listen, I mean really listen to what she has to say, if your father and I had taken more time to really hear each other we could have saved so much pain." John Ross looked at his mother and tried to focus on what she had said but his heart was racing and all he could think about was Pamela and the importance of what would happen next!

As she came into view he caught his breath, she looked almost goddess like as she approached. Her chestnut hair billowing in the warm evening breeze, she tossed her head as she glided her hand across the front of her tresses to keep them away from her face. She looked up, her eyes found his at once, they were dazzling in their intensity he could not look away as she finally stood before him. She broke their gaze and turned to his mother.

"Sue Ellen" She turned her attention to him. "John Ross." She made a point to acknowledge his mother first as she gave her an affectionate smile and both women hugged in greeting. She did not attempt to make any contact with John Ross only fixing a determined stare on her face as she said his name.

"I think I'll go inside I need to check with Ann on the arrangements for the benefit we're hosting, I'll see you before you leave?" Inquired Sue Ellen with an air of hopefulness.

"Of course!" Beamed Pamela.

"OK, good!" She turned and looked at her son with warmth and concern in her eyes. " John Ross." She added with a knowing look, trying to impart her support, she kissed him and gave Pamela a gentle smile as she made her way inside.

They stood for a while each surveying the other, John Ross, his hands in his pockets, Pamela her hands crossed in-front of her chest. He noticed that her hand was indeed heavily bandaged as Christopher had said.

"So what gives Pamela, how'd ya hurt your hand? Christopher said you'd hurt it. Even accused me of causing the damage!" He attempted to make light of the last sentence but failed miserably.

"Christopher? I don't know why he' do that? I told him I cut it on a vase!" What in the hell was Christopher playing at, she didn't need him interfering in her life, she could handle herself, she made a mental note to put him straight the next time she saw him.

"Well he came here all fired up ready to defend your honor talking about protecting you from me and all kinds of bullshit, is there something I should know about you two?" This was going wrong, he hadn't meant to get all defensive and angry, shouldn't have mentioned Christopher, the more he spoke about him the more he became infuriated. Damn it to hell, it was all going south.

"Something you should know? What does that mean exactly?" If he had something to say he better make it clear right now, so she could blow him out of the water once and for all!

The fire in her eyes and the fact she hadn't immediately shot down his accusation made his temper explode. He was dissapointed with her response but even more angry with himself, they were wasting time discussing his ass of a cousin when all he really wanted to do was fix things back the way they had been before Emma had sabotaged it. His insecurities about Christopher clouded his logic as he persisted his questioning and snapped back.

"Don't play innocent with me Pamela, we have an argument and within minutes cousin Christopher is riding to your defense, I thought you two never spoke unless it was to do with business yet all of sudden he's here talking about your parental bond and his new found loyalty to your well being? Seems a tad convenient wouldn't you say, now that Emma's climb out of the woodwork!, been doing some extra bonding lately?"

As soon as the words left his mouth he wanted to rip out his tongue he knew it was bull-crap and he didn't mean any of it but his mind had become warped where Christopher was concerned and he could not bare the thought of being burnt by losing her to him like he had lost before. The more he thought about what Christopher had said earlier, the more it became clear something had changed between his cousin and Pamela and since a shift in his relationship with her had also occurred, it intensified his anxiety and dis-trust.

"You know, I won't even dignify your accusation with a response, except to say that maybe you should try not to judge everybody by your own standards." John Ross physically winced when Pamela delivered those words, there was a grain of truth to what she had said but what hurt him more was that he had been faithful to her throughout their marriage and she did not believe that to be true.

"I'll get straight to the point of my visit John Ross, I see no reason to prolong this any further." He didn't like the sound of her voice or what she was saying. this was not part of his plan. Pamela, however, felt confident and in control, she drew strength from the the uncertain look in his eyes, he would see that she was not a lady to be messed with, no matter how much she loved him. She would hurt him where she knew he would feel it most. A deliciously devilish smile appeared on her face.

"I've come from my attorney, who reliably informs me that he can see no reason why a divorce should take too long, in fact he thinks that we can get it done in a couple of months!" She watched as her statement took it's full affect.

"What are you talking about Pamela. You're outta your mind if you think I'm gonna agree to a divorce, it aint gonna happen!" They began to slowly circle the patio table increasing the circumference as they did.

"Oh! But it is going to happen John, I am divorcing you and there isn't anything you can do about it!"

The fact she omitted the second half of his name stabbed him through the heart, she was the only one who ever referred to him in that way and the fact she chose to omit it now to ram home her intent to divorce him hurt like hell. It was out of context and it unsettled him.

"I thought you came here to talk, but it seems you've got it all figured out, you said that you love me but I guess I should have known I'd get burned in the end!" He took his hands out of his pockets, went over to the drinks trolley and poured himself a drink downing it in one.

"I did everything you asked but it wasn't enough. I wasn't enough. You had to sleep with HER! And to top it all just in case that wasn't enough of a humiliation you not only force yourself on her but you get her pregnant... You think you've been burned, I think in the scheme of things I've been burned worst?" He charged towards her and she stepped back.

"I've never forced myself on her, hell I'd never force myself on anyone, come on Pamela, it aint my style. Sleeping with Emma was a mistake, it happened just after JR's death. I was a mess I wasn't thinkin straight and she was there it meant nothin, we slept together again right bef.."

"I don't care, I don't wanna know the sordid details, I'm done being hurt by men, I'm done being hurt by Ewing men I want a clean break so I'd be grate..." It was John Ross's turn to interrupt.

"Dont. Don't you do that Pamela, don't lump me together with the other men who've hurt you in your life, don't compare me to them... Don't compare me to Christopher. "

"I was there for you when he wasn't and I wanted to be there... It hurt like hell when you were in the hospital and I had to wait outside your room to find out what was happening. It drove me crazy that he got to see you and I couldn't, I wanted to kill uncle Bobby when he told that TESHA guy that he should leave 'cos the family had a medical emergency that concerned his sons babies. They didn't care about you. I did. All they cared about were those babies."

"I asked Christopher to put them first, I told him that's what I wanted, we agreed. I made him promise." She answered with a far away look on her face. John Ross felt his ire rising again, she was defending him and in his eyes Christopher didn't desrve it. He softened his tone and regarded her with tenderness.

"You made it easy for him Pamela, you really think he would have made the same choices if it had been Elena?" He stopped circling and face her, he moved around the table and stood directly in-front of her, he wanted to reach for her so badly.

"None of it matters now John Ross, I won't put myself in a position were I can be hurt again! I believe you didn't force yourself on Emma, but If she has your child I don't think I could live with that. We are too alike you said it youself, we scheme, seduce and betray and in the end that's who we are. As much as we've tried to exist from a place of trust, that trust has been broken. You never told me about Emma, never once and that's left us in a place of betrayl that I don't think we can recover from."

"I asked you once about her, I always got this funny vibe whenever she was around, even caught her looking at you all moon eyed a couple of times, I told you and I asked you then if there had ever been anything between you and you looked me in the eye, you looked me in the eye and you said NO! You said NO!" "I refuse to continue in a relationship were there is no trust. I'm worth more than that."

"I never went near her after we got married. I wouldn't." Pamela?" "I should have told you, I can see that now, I was ashamed, it didn't mean anything and I didn't want to ruin it with us when things were so fresh, I knew I'd made a mistake after she told me about the baby and I was gonna tell you, I just wanted to give us time, to give you time be happy, you deserved that!" He looked at her and although they were now inches apart the void between them emotionally seemed to increase with every word he spoke, he didn't know what to do.

" Uncle Bobby's arranging for a DNA test or something to find out for sure if I'm the father ..."

"Bobby knows?" She looked horrified.

"He already knew, when I got here she was feedin him and Ann her lies."

"Like I said none of it really matter anymore, she does live here after all and she'll be showing soon. At least you can be together now like you planned." She stepped back again and pushed her hair away from her face. He wasn't going to confuse her now, she couldn't trust him... She wouldn't. She had to follow through on her plan. "I have to go!" She had no intention of doing so, but she knew if she threatened to leave he would stop her and try to plead with her, this was going to be good.

"I never told that bitch I'd leave you for her!" She did not respond, he decided on another approach. "You can't walk out on me! We're partners we've got a business to run decisions to make!" Emotionally, she had shut down so he gambled that by mentioning business he could appeal to her intellect instead. He had played right into her hands. She had him right where she wanted him.

"Partners, you and me?" She screwed up her face and exaggerated a look of confusion as she crossed her arms over her chest again.

"I'm sorry did I forget to mention that since I had my shares going into our marriage they remain mine as does anything else I owned. Of course that also applies to you. So you can rest assured that Southfork still belongs to you and your uncle, however, since Ewing Energies was bought by Barnes Global it now belongs to Ewing Global of which I own 1/3 share. Seems to me you should have signed a pre-nup after all but don't worry, I'm sure if you kiss and make up with Emma you'll be able to get a piece of Ryland Industries." "Tell your mama I had to go, I'll give her a call and arrange lunch."

She turned on her heels and swiftly left. John Ross was speechless, his face in total shock as he watched her depart. How had this happened, when he woke up this morning he had a feeling In the pit of his stomach that things would go wrong, what was it he had said to her "things always fall apart for me just right when I feel like I'm on top." We'll he'd got that right, he couldn't let her have the last word, he hurried after her and caught her just as she was about to enter her car. He held on to the open door.

"Mighty convenient Pamela. How long you had that trick up your sleeve waitin to land?" He could not mask the hurt in his eyes or in the sound of his voice.

"I trusted you Pamela when we got married, we agreed to be partners fifty fifty in everythin. I should have guessed your actions were just as much a lie as your words?" The realisation of her betrayal shook him to his core. He was more devastated by that, than the loss of his joint share in the company.

"You can tell yourself that if it make you feel better but I went into this marriage loving you. Not knowing if you loved me back. You were there for me when no else had been. You sat with me, you called, you checked on me, you made sure my mother was at the hospital and you never left till after the babies died; even then you were always there, so I thought that maybe there was a chance you'd be able to tell me one day that you loved me but it never came did it John Ross, it never came because you never felt it did you? It was all an act, you played me, you and Emma. She told me. I thought that everything we had we'd share together. I thought we'd be the dynamic duo but all the time that was someone else wasn't it? Well I hope you'll both be happy!"

"I had no ulterior motives when I married you. When you asked me if I was marrying you because I loved you or because I wanted revenge, I answered you honestly, I said I do and I meant it, but what were your reasons John Ross? You talked about not wanting to get burned and protecting your own interest. Was I just a means to an end? You know what, don't answer that I don't want to know. It doesn't matter. You lost your claim, you got burned. I can't say I'm disappointed it's no more than you deserve." Her voice was full of contempt but her eyes belied her words, they could not hide a slither of sadness as she finished her onslaught.

He opened his mouth to reject her statement, but found himself thoughtful instead, now was his opportunity, now he could tell her he loved her, he wanted to, he looked into her eyes and he wanted to but he knew it was futile. She would never believe him now, she would think it was part of a move and her disdain for him would be final. It reminded him of a earlier time when he had tried to tell her Cliff had been responsible for the explosion. It hadn't gone in his favour then, there was no reason to believe things wold be any different now. Maybe she was right, they never really trusted each other. He was jolted out of his reverie as she pulled the door from his grasp and slammed it shut as she seated herself in her car.

"Get the hell away from me John Ross! Go find Emma I'm sure she waiting for you somewhere around here... Well she's welcome to you, stay away from me John. I mean it!" And with that she put the car into gear and glided away as John Ross looked on feeling empty, raw and bereft. For once he didn't know his next move, he hung his head retraced his steps and retrieved the bourbon as he entered the house...

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**Well there it is. I hope you all thought it was worth the wait. Were you surprised at who Pamela had been to visit? It was a tricky chapter to write; hence the delay but I think it holds true to their characters. Can Sue Ellen save John Ross from self destruction? Is Emma carrying John Ross's child? Will Pamela go through with her threat of divorce? See yah all soon... :)**


	6. It's Still Him For Me

Actions Speak Louder Than Words Chapter 6

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters from Dallas or the show itself. They ALL belong to TNT.**

**It's been a while guy's... Hope you like it! CreativeLola... THANKS! ;) and thank you Everyone for your patience and the lovely reviews from the last chapter.**

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**Actions Speak Louder Than Words**

**Chapter 6**

**It's Still Him For Me**

Sue Ellen was worried, it had been days and John Ross still would not talk about what had happened between him and Pamela. He went about business as usual but he no longer stayed at Southfork choosing to move back into his own apartment.

It was the day of the benefit which she had organised along with Ann; it was being held at Southfork. She had chosen not to discuss the situation surrounding their children, but once the benefit was over she was going to have it out with her. Sue Ellen felt Ann needed a rude awakening where it concerned Emma and she was ready to enlighten her!

"Well everything looks just dandy don't you think Sue Ellen, I think all our hard work has paid off?" Beamed Ann.

"Yes, I think we've done a great job Ann, now if you'll excuse me I need to get changed." replied Sue Ellen with a tight smile.

"Sue Ellen?" Ann reached out and touched Sue Ellen's arm, "Is everything alright. I mean, I know there's this... (she struggled for the right word) **"situation"** with John Ross but I hope you can see that I don't blame you? Emma's not going to press charges, she said she didn't want any more trouble for the family after everything we've been through, these last months."

"Well, at least she's learned to think about someone other than herself!" returned Sue Ellen, barely able to veil the sarcasm in her voice." She made her way to enter the house but was stopped by Ann's next words.

"I'm not sure what you mean by that Sue Ellen, maybe you'd like to explain?" Ann's eyes burned with fury.

Sue Ellen did not want to do this right now but she had been holding on to her emotions for too long, she took a deep breath and answered.

"I'm not really sure you want me to answer that Ann, and I'm not sure that now is the right time but I think you know the truth. Emma is lying, John Ross didn't do anything to her that she wasn't happy to do. We're both mothers, a mother's love is fierce, but it's not stupid Ann and you're no fool... Don't let her play you for a fool, you know John Ross. He may be many things but you know he's not responsible for this... situation, at least not by himself.

Emma wanted it. She has an unhealthy fixation with my son and I'll be damned if she or anybody else thinks I'm going to stand by and see her ruin the happiness his found with Pamela. I think you'll find Ann that you're not the only one who protects their child, so if you and Emma are determined to pursue my son, for no other reason than Emma's unhealthy obsession with him, then you had better be ready for a damn good fight because I learned a lot being married to JR and I've no intention of loosing. Now, If you'll excuse me, I really do need to get ready!"

As she made her way inside Sue Ellen felt empowered and a little relieved, she would have preferred to make her feeling known after the benefit but she could hold it no longer. Ann had pushed her and she had reacted, she did not bother to take a look at the impact her words had inflicted on Ann. Ann had chosen to believe Emma and their friendship was a casualty of her lies, she couldn't allow herself to think about it now. She needed to get changed and make a call to her son.

**AN HOUR LATER...**

Sue Ellen took one last look at her reflection, she wore a figure hugging shift dress with a simple pearl necklace that JR had given her in their first year of marriage. She touched them and smiled briefly, oh how she missed that old rascal. She surveyed JR's room, so many memories, not all of them bad, what she wouldn't give to have him back, to have a chance at putting all those past wrongs right and having the kind of relationship with him she had always wanted. Of course that would never happen now but she felt comforted by the fact that had he lived he too would have wanted the same. Worry lines formed across her forehead, what would she do about John Ross. Since he and Pamela had spoken he had not been the same and she had only manged to talk to Pamela fleetingly regarding the benefit.

She tried his number several times but he did not pick up, he knew about the benefit today and she wanted him to be here; in truth so she could keep an eye on him, he had been drinking a lot lately and she knew only too well the consequences of that particular endevour! She decided to leave a message.

"John Ross, I had hoped to talk to you in person but since you're... she sighed **unavailable**, I guess I'll leave you a message instead," she removed the phone from her ear and glanced at it as if she expected it to speak, when it did not she continued.

"I want you here John Ross, I want you at Southfork, I'm holding the benefit in order to raise money for research into complications in pregnancy and I had hoped you'd be here... John Ross?" She address him directly, trying in desperation to connect with him. She made one last attempt. "I've invited Pamela?" She got no reply. She paused for a second and hung up placing her phone in her purse as she made her way downstairs to receive her guests.

John Ross listened to his mothers voice as his answering machine picked up the call. He was only mildly aware it was her because the voice mentioned something about a benefit. He finished off his drink and began to pour himself another, how many was that now? Six? Seven? Not including the liquid lunch he'd had earlier whilst trying to make sense of the divorce papers Pamela had sent him. He couldn't even talk to her about it, she had been un-reachable; away on business her secretary had said?

The voice coming from the machine mentioned Pamela. He put the glass down, moved swiftly to the machine and press rewind. He positioned himself in a seat opposite the recorder, sitting forward his head bowed with his hands clasped around his neck, eyes closed in deep concentration as he listened to the message again. Yup, his mother had said she'd invited Pamela and he knew that despite her reluctance to be anywhere near him, she would be there. He reached for his jacket and picked up his keys, his eyes fell to the empty glass before him, just one more he thought as he poured himself another glass...

Pamela knew that she needed to leave now if she wanted to get to the benefit on time. She had not been back to her apartment except to pick up a few items, instead she had gone to stay with her childhood friend and college buddy Seth.

There was a point when it seemed like they might have been more but somehow the timing was never right and the moment had passed. Seth was still tight with a couple other buddies from law school and Pamela had enjoyed re-connecting with her old friends. Seth had promised to go with her tonight and she was grateful for that, she needed the support of a friend; especially tonight.

"You okay Pam?" Seth stood beside her and gently place his hand on the small of her back as he leaned his head slightly dipping his knees in order to make eye contact with her. His voice was gentle and soothing, his huge chocolate eyes filled with concern. She didn't look at him as she replied, focusing instead on the mosaic tiled floor.

"No, I'm okay." He placed his index finger under her chin and tipped it up gently.

"Hey, it's okay if you need a little more time, everyone will understand, Do you want me to ring and send your apologies?"

"You're sweet Seth and I know you're trying to be supportive but I need to be there for me and for Robert and Ellie I want to do whatever I can to help raise funds for this charity. It means a lot to me." She reached up and squeezed his hand, then turned towards the door. Seth held onto her hand she glanced backwards, their eyes held once more. The compassion and intensity emanating from Seth engulfed her, it was almost tangible, it was soothing, loving and rich with a deep sense of genuine concern, it was precisely what she needed and she was grateful to her friend. He pulled her towards him and wrapped her in his embrace, she stayed nestled against his chest feeling totally at ease and for the first time in a long time, truly supported and cared for, no hidden agenda, no secrets, no lies, just one friend comforting the other.

"I'm sorry I wasn't here when you lost the twins Pam. Once I heard, I tried to make it back, it was impossible, you know that right?"

"I know." She said simply. They did not release their hold of each other.

"Do you?" He stepped back from their embrace and searched for her eyes to meet his. He saw the panic that met him there and realised he had probed too far, he was disappointed with himself, she looked fearful and he hated himself for it. He had done that... God damn it why couldn't he just learn when to stop! He brushed his hands through his glossy chocolate curls and turned away.

"I'm sorry Pam, I shouldn't have."

"Seth, we're friends, just friends I need that in my life right now, someone I can trust someone who knows the real me not the cold calculating bitch everyone thinks I am. You've known me a long time, we grew up together, went to the same college, You took me to prom in high school! I can't handle any more than that, I need you to be my friend but that's all. I may not be with John Ross but I still love him, that doesn't go away because things get messy. It's complicated with us it's never been allowed to be about the two of us, there's this whole Barnes Ewing feud and now Emma and the baby. Damn it even Chris has decided to stick his nose in! Of course I know you would have been there with me when I lost the twins but you were on your boat sailing around the Pacific or Atlantic or wherever the hell you always said you'd go," she smiled and manged a genuine chuckle. She became serious once more. "There was nothing you could do, there was nothing anyone could do!"

"But the thought of you being alone..., I knew what a jerk Christopher had been. I said I'd be there for you when the time came and I let you down, we've always been there for each other... remember our plans about me being your birthing coach?"

"Yeah I remember and that would have been cool but don't be so hard on yourself, my mother came and she was so sweet to me singing me lullaby's and I had John Ross. He grimaced. I never imagined he could be so caring and so sensitive but he was. He used to call me at least three/four times every day after he found me out on the balcony, I was a mess, I was rambling and a little out of it. He came over with lunch every day and stay over most nights, he slept right next to me holding me, wiping my tears, talking when I wanted to, silent when I didn't. He never said it out loud but I think finding me the way he did really shook him up. I think he thought I might take my own life. I never said it before but if he hadn't of been there I think I just might have. The energy between them had changed. It had gone from comfort, support and warmth to intimate longing, guilt and anxiety, settling finally with, love, appreciation and regret.

"I'll always be there for you Pam, you know that, I think you know how I feel about you and I'm so sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable, I promise I'll behave and we'll say no more about it. I won't pretend that it won't be hard; especially if you decide to go back to him but I've always felt strongly about you and I think maybe you've felt the same way too. I'm not pushing Pam I'm trying to be honest and tell you that my feelings are my problem, I don't want there to be any secrets between us. I want to be here for you in anyway that you need me to be, but make no mistake, if he hurts you again I won't stand by and watch it happen, I can't... I won't."

"You're a good friend Seth and I appreciate you wanting to protect me, but I can handle John Ross, I don't want you getting involved. I love him and I don't see that changing any time soon. I don't wanna hurt you like that Seth you're too important too me and I won't ask you to stand by and torture yourself watching my relationship with him play out. I'll move back to my apartment... it's time."

She had known for years that his feelings were more than platonic. If she were honest she had toyed with idea of a relationship herself but only fleetingly and only when she had been feeling vulnerable; Seth always made her feel so safe and loved. She had decided long ago that they worked best as friends and she wanted that for them. Being with John Ross only made that more clear and even now, even after everything she had learned recently it was still him for her. One day Seth would understand but until then she made a mental note to be careful with his heart.

"You know I don't want you to go but I'll respect your decision... " Now was not the time to press her on her feelings for him, she may think she loved that useless piece of crap she called a husband, but he knew that given time she would recognise that her feelings were tied up with gratitude about his support for her at the loss of her twins and the fact that through her difficulties with Chris he had been her allie. His biggest regret had been his decision to go on that boating trip if only he had stayed! Still she would recognise that her feelings for him had been the truth all along and he'd be ready when she did. He needed to lighten the mood, he decided to try and help the process by making her relax. He took a deep breath gave her his brightest smile and continued. "So... wha'd'ya say, lets go Barnsey?" He reached for her arm and looped it through his.

"Hey! You can't call me that anymore!" She pouted feigning her disapproval, whilst playfully shoving him with her free hand.

"As your oldest and dearest friend I reserve the right to call you whatever the hell I like and since you've basically eaten me out of house and home, not to mention invading my bathroom with all your feminine products, I'd say it's the least you owe me!"

"Since you put it like that, I guess I'll allow it!" They were back to being friends and it felt good. She looked up at him and scrunched her nose in contentment squeezing him tightly. " OK Spidey, let's go raise some money!"

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**There you go. ;) Hope you're not too disappointed? All hell breaks loose in the next chapter see you soon!**


	7. Never Gonna Be Over

Actions Speak Louder Than Words Chapter 7

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters from Dallas or the show itself. They ALL belong to TNT. **

**You guy's have been so awesome and patient with me. I really appreciate it. So I decided to squirrel away and worked really hard to publish this a bit early as a thank you to you all! Hope you like ;)**

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**Actions Speak Louder Than Words**

**Chapter 7**

**Never Gonna Be Over**

He saw the little bitch the minute he stepped out of the car, she was strolling towards the stables and he was going to follow. When he finally caught up to her she was headed into one of the stalls.

"Hold up there Emma, we need to talk!" She stopped abruptly and turned towards him replacing the catch on the stall door. As she turned, the corner of her mouth eased into a smirk.

"What do you want John Ross? She made her way over to him unfastening his shirt, whilst pushing her pelvis up against his manhood. John Ross looked down at her, his cheeks somewhat flushed from drinking, his reaction delayed as he removed her hands from his now slightly exposed chest.

"What are you doin? Get away from me." He moved away whilst she remained rooted to the spot looking somewhat stunned and crestfallen. He attempted to refasten his shirt but gave up in frustration. "I told you... You and me? It aint never gonna happen again! Get it into your head! I don't want you! I never have! You were easy, you were available when Pamela wasn't! Did you really think I'd choose you over her?"

She squinted her eyes and settled her right hand on her slightly protruding stomach as she began to rub gently in circular motions. Her glorious golden mane cascaded around her face as she bent her head to look at her little package.

"Well I guess it doesn't really matter now, cos I've got the one thing your Precious Pampered little Pammie can't have. I've got your child growing in my stomach. I've got the next Ewing heir. I'm carrying John Ross IV and there isn't a thing you can do about it!" She raised her head and delivered her news with smug satisfaction.

John Ross visibly paled and clamped down hard on his jaw, pushing his hands in his pockets. He knew she couldn't possibly be sure because the test was scheduled for tomorrow. Clearly she was trying to rattle his cage. John Ross steeled himself at the idea of it and calmly surveyed her from where he stood as he scornfully spewed his next words with gusto.

"We both know that you were sleeping with Drew around the time you went with me and god knows how many other men. I doubt very much you'd be carrying my child. You see, the Ewing sperm's a little more... Choosy." Satisfied with his response he made to leave but before he could exit the barn she replied.

"Didn't stop your alcohol addicted mother from conceiving you!" His body went rigid, he could not move, his head began to throb; as much from the drink he had consumed, as from what she had just said. He turned slowly, he could see her stupid little smirk slowly slipping as her eyes widen with the realisation that she had gone a step too far.

"What did you say?" He took a few steps closer as she backed away; rubbing her hands nervously, glancing furtively for a route to escape. There was none.

"You heard me!" She felt sheepish but she refused to give him the satisfaction and in truth she had taken some pills earlier that morning, which always made her feel more invincible. "You don't scare me you wouldn't dare hurt me. Not after the lies I've already told about you. Why don't you use your Ewing charm instead, you know, like it was with us when we made love those times before?"

"Are you high? God dammit Emma you're pregnant! What about the baby?"

"Oh come on John Ross. The baby'll be okay, I didn't take that many, just enough to give me a buzz. I wouldn't need it if you'd stop being such a bitch and admit that you want me." She moved closer. "There's no one around, their all at the benefit, we could do it right here, come on..."

"You' gotta be outta you're mind if you think I'd ever touch **you** again. I've told you I wanna be with Pamela and it don't matter how you try and spin it that'll never change!"

"We could be so good together, here take some of these, you know you want to!" she reached into her purse pulling out a small plastic canister and extended her arm with the item contained in her hand. "It'll make you relaxed and we can be together. You don't need her, I doubt she'll ever be able to have babies again anyway. Stay married to her, that'll still work. I mean we can screw her for all she's worth. I'll have your baby and then; when she' lost everything, we can get married." Her face turned from a pleading temptress, to a deer that had been caught in the headlights, because just behind John Ross was her mother holding her shawl which had now fallen to the ground as she looked on in horror!

"I believed you! ** I. Believed. In You! ** Sue Ellen was right, everybody was right, your just a scheming manipulative spoilt little rich girl... How could I have been so gullible!" Ann moved slowly into the barn and stopped beside John Ross.

"It's not how it seems!" pleaded Emma her brain going into overdrive trying to formulate her excuse.

"Shut up Emma, I heard you! How could you?" Ann's face looked tortured.

"How much did you hear?" Panic had set in.

"All of it, I heard your voices as I approached, I was looking for you to give you your shawl, I couldn't believe my ears, the things you said,the things you've done, my god I don't really know you at all do I?"

"You don't understand I..."

"Don't. And you're taking drugs, you're pregnant, how could you? Give me you're purse." Emma sheepishly handed it over to Ann as her mother snatched it and began to address John Ross.

"I'm so sorry John Ross, I'm humiliated, can you ever forgive me? I've been such a fool. It wasn't you it's been my daughter all along!" I blame myself, If only I'd kept my eye on her all those years ago, she wouldn't have been taken. Things would have been so different!" Tears welled up in Ann's eyes as she looked at John Ross apologetically.

He couldn't deny his relief at the fact she had heard the truth but this whole mess had cost him dearly and he wasn't ready to forgive quite so easily, he hated the total devastation he witnessed in Ann's expression, however, he wasn't ready to forgive.

"She needs help, we'll get the paternity test done tomorrow so we can clear this mess up once and for all and then I want her off Southfork, I aim on getting Pamela back and she aint welcome around here no more. If the baby's mine, I'll set her up in an apartment somewhere and once it's born, it'll be raised here with me and Pamela.

"Over my dead body!" Railed Emma.

"Well darlin that aint the way I'd want it to be but there's not a chance in hell I'd let you raise any child of mine, so I guess it looks like, I won't be the only one, hopin that I'm **not** the daddy?"

"That barren bitch'll never agree to that!" screamed Emma. John Ross charged at her and came right up to her face. He wanted so badly to wring her neck, he grabbed hold of her and stared into her face murderously.

"Shut you're dirty little mouth! You're sick Emma and what you just said right then. Proves it. You aint human, there's not an ounce of compassion in you. I hope to god, that if the child aint mine someone intervenes to save it, cos having you as a mother means it's gonna need all the help it can get."

He moved away as Ann rushed towards her daughter, he could not make out what she said and he didn't care, it had taken all the mental capacity that wasn't dulled from the drink to prevent him from strangling the girl and he wanted out as fast as he could.

He made his way briskly if not a little unsteadily, towards the house, he went inside and poured himself a drink... He heard her before he could see her but he'd recognise that voice in a crowd of a million voices, she was just outside the patio doors. He could hear another voice, male, less familiar but not completely alien. Where had he heard that tone before, he carefully listened maybe the conversation would give it away.

"I'll get us a drink, shall I?" queried the male voice with a dash of humour.

"Okay that would be nice, you choose. Surprise me. You know what I like. I'll trust you, don't let me down!" Replied Pamela with girlish abandon.

She sounded so light and happy, totally opposite to how his time in exile away from her had him feeling. His stomach felt queezy, his head was throbbing. He raised his hand to his head and massaged his temple. What was that she said?

_**"I'll trust you! Don't let me down!"** _What he wouldn't give to have her utter those words to him. A few short weeks ago those phrases would have been his to keep... _**"You know what I like!"** _Jesus what in the hell did that mean...? He'd break the son of a bitch in half...

"You know I'd never do that Barnsey."

John Ross knew the instant the nick name was used. It had to be her childhood friend Seth. He had met Seth on several occasions; he didn't like him. There was something in the way he looked at Pamela, something in the way he always tried to steer conversation back to his and Pamela's past experiences, he was subtle but he wasn't fooled, he only tolerated him because it seemed to make Pamela happy.

The fact that he was here with her on what he knew, for her, would be a difficult occasion inflamed his already agitated state further. There was no way he was gonna be replaced by that... Spidey... was it? **Geek Pussy more like it!** What did she see in him anyway? He was not what he'd call good looking and certainly not her type. **He** was **her type**, **he** was **her husband. ** To hell with divorce papers and Emma and everybody else who seemed to want a piece of his marriage and his woman.

He stepped out cautiously maneuvering himself onto the patio; he wanted to ensure their first meeting in weeks was not tarnished by his slightly inebriated state, he needn't have bothered, she was no longer there. He scanned the area until his eyes located her. As usual, she was breathtaking. Her hair was swept up into a sophisticated chignon with a few loose tendrils, adding to the seductive allure for effect. She was wearing a sheer black floor length alter neck evening gown. Most of her back was completely exposed but the material draped seductively just below the base of her spine. He could see Seth standing beside her, having retrieved her drink, his hand nestling comfortably at the small of her back as he guided her through the crowds to the far end of the gathering.

That was his job, his girl, nobody touched her like that. Hell no! He'd have to be cold in his grave before he'd allow that to happen. He whipped his hands out of his pockets and began to move towards them. Before he had barely moved a hand was placed firmly on his shoulder.

"Pamela's looking smoking tonight cousin, who's the guy?" It was said with such glee and in a deeply mocking tone that John Ross wanted to inflict physical harm! He shrugged his cousin off, then turned and gave him the benefit of his "D_on't fuck with me or mine stare!" _and proceeded towards her again.

"Hey! John Ross, I wouldn't go over there right now, you look like you've had too much to drink and causing a scene isn't gonna help you with Pamela, especially tonight!"

"And just why do you care so much, do tell cousin?" His eye's glinted like steel as he turned and faced Chritopher.

Christopher was grating on his last nerve, added to his earlier encounter with Emma, combined with geek boy pawing Pamela, topped with the unlimited amount of drink he had consumed... He didn't have a great deal of restraint left... He was in no mood for his cousin's bullshit!

"I told you, that I'd be looking out for Pamela and I meant it! You ruining tonight would be just about the lowest thing you could do to her right now and if you really want her back I suggest you back off and leave her be!" Christopher's advice was sound but it came like a red rag to a bull, John Ross turned and lunged at his cousin. Christopher stood near the entrance to the patio doors and as John Ross reached him, he side-stepped and John Ross toppled into the doorway.

Bobby and Sue Ellen appeared as if by magic, Bobby ushered him quickly inside, motioning to Christopher to follow. Sue Ellen scuttled along behind, sighing and shouting her son's name trying in vain to get him to calm down. John Ross attempted to resisted his uncle's restraint aided by Christopher, however, he was in no fit state to do much about it. They closed the patio doors behind them and made their way to the study, all the while John Ross was cursing and rambling.

"John Ross!" Admonished Bobby, "For god sake get a grip!" John Ross finally managed to shake himself free from the vice hold his uncle had over him and collapse into a chair near the desk.

"What give's uncle Bobby?" He felt a little dis-orientated. " I gotta go talk to Pamela!" He tried to get up but missed his hold on the arm rest and flopped back into the seat.

"Your not going anywhere till you sober up, do you really think you'll win Pamela over in that state?" reasoned Bobby, crossing his arms and shaking his head in disapproval.

"I'm done with this bullshit, I'm getting Pamela back and ya'll better stay outta my way!" Sue Ellen glanced at Bobby and gave him a knowing nod to signal that she wanted to be alone with her son. Bobby ushered Christopher towards the exit, unfortunately Christopher could not resist one last comment before he left.

"I say we let him be, his already ruined things between him and Pamela, he's a hot head and he aint gonna listen, she's better off without him... Huh, seems to me she's already moved on and almost every red blooded male here tonight will be making a bee line for her, he's done she'll never take him back!"

John Ross was instantly on his feet closing the distance between them like a lion as it pounces on it's prey. This time he was accurate in his assault making no mistake; landing a punch which sent Christopher tumbling to the floor. In his haste to attack his cousin, Sue Ellen; who had been making her way towards her son, went flying and slammed vigorously into the bookcase causing an instant shooting pain in her wrist as she used her hand to try to steady herself.

John Ross went berserk, he was like a crazed animal. He followed Christopher to the floor leaping on top of him, pounding him repeatedly, whilst shouting at the top of his voice.

"I warned you boy, Pamela aint none of your concern. It aint over between us... It's never gonna be over and all this crazy bullshit you keep spouting is only gonna land you in Dallas Memorial!" Bobby was struggling to pull John Ross off Christopher,

"Get off me you crazy son of bitch... You're drunk!" Those words only inflamed him more.

"Sue Ellen?" A voice could be heard from the other side of the door, In the midst of all the commotion no-one had noticed the study door swing open. All eyes turned towards the open door to reveal Pamela, who's face went from bright and breezy to total shock and horror. She took in the scene before her and immediately noticed Sue Ellen standing nursing her arm.

"Oh my God! Sue Ellen are you okay... let me see?" As she studied the injury she continued to speak, "What in the hell is going on...?"

* * *

**What's your guess? What will happen next? Will John Ross convince Pam to take him back? Will the paternity test prove John Ross to be the father of Emma's baby? Will Emma finally go away? Will we finally see a face to face between Pamela and Emma? Is Seth really as nice as he seems, or is it too early to tell?**

**Some of the answers to these questions will be revealed in the next chapter. Stay tuned to find out! See you soon guys ;)**


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